Supporting a loved one through mental health challenges can feel overwhelming, however even small gestures can make a meaningful difference. If you're wondering how to help a friend with mental health concerns, the most important thing you can do is show up with patience, kindness and an open mind. You don’t need to have all the answers — listening and offering a safe space can go a long way.

Whether your friend is experiencing anxiety, depression or another challenge, learning how to help a friend with mental health concerns can ensure you offer the right kind of support while also taking care of yourself.

Ahead of this year’s Mental Health Awareness Week, in which the national theme is “Community”, this week guest writer Beth Rush returns for her fourth article for Calmer, sharing an overview of different mental health conditions, effective communication strategies to help a friend in need, and practical ways to offer them support.

Understanding an overview of mental health conditions

Mental health conditions are more common than most people realise, and 1 in 4 people in the UK will experience a mental health problem in any given year. Mental health challenges can affect anyone, regardless of their age, background or lifestyle, and our environment and circumstances can play a significant part in contributing to how we feel on a daily basis.

Types of Mental Health Conditions

Some of the most commonly experienced conditions include:

● Anxiety disorders: This vary from Generalised Anxiety Disorder, to Phobia, to Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) to name a few, and involves excessive worry, fear or nervousness that can take the joy out of daily living.

● Depression: There are many forms of depression which involve a consistent feeling of sadness, low mood or detachment from daily life, losing interest in things and a sense of hopelessness.

● Bipolar disorder: This condition is characterised by significant mood swings between periods of elevated (manic or hypomanic) mood and periods of depression, impacting energy, mood and daily activities.

● Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD): This condition involves persistent, intrusive thoughts, often leading to compulsive behaviours like checking or counting things numerous times as a way to feel more in control of your circumstances.

Your role as a friend

Although globally we have come a long way in public understanding and awareness of mental health, sadly one of the biggest challenges people with mental health conditions still face is stigma. Many people don’t fully understand what these experiences entail, leading to judgment or misconceptions — like assuming someone is just being “lazy” or “overreacting.” Stigma isolates people, making their struggles even harder to manage and leaving them with feelings of shame.

If you have a friend that is struggling with their mental health, your role isn’t to diagnose them or “solve” their struggles — it is to offer understanding, kindness, patience and a judgment-free space. Mental health struggles can feel overwhelming, and your friend needs someone to support them with unconditional kindness, which can make them feel seen, valued and less alone.

Effective Communication Strategies

Talking about how to help a friend with a mental illness can feel uncomfortable, especially if you are unsure about how to approach the conversation. However, remember that checking in with your friend shows that you care, that you are willing to listen, and that you are there for them unconditionally.

Here are some ways you can reach out to offer safety and support.

1. Start the Conversation Gently

Instead of starting with direct questions, try a gentle, open approach, like:

● “I’ve noticed you don’t seem like yourself lately. Is everything ok?”

● “You don’t have to share if you’re not ready, but I want you to know I’m here for you.”

● “I care about you, and I’d like to check in.”

Avoid judgmental or dismissive statements, such as:

● “Cheer up.”

● “You’re overthinking it.”

● “Other people have it worse.”

Mental health struggles are real, and they’re not a choice. Your friend isn’t being dramatic or difficult — they are in pain and need your support and understanding.

2. Practice Active Listening

Sometimes, the best support you can offer is listening without trying to provide solutions. It’s about creating a safe space where your friend feels seen, heard and understood — as tempting as it may feel, try not to rush to give advice. Here’s how:

● Give them your full attention: Put away your phone, maintain eye contact and be fully present, even if the conversation makes you feel uncomfortable.

● Mirror what you hear: Paraphrasing what your friend says can help them think clearly, show you correctly understand them and encourage them to keep talking. For example, using words they have shared to reflect back to them how they truly feel, you could say, “It sounds like you are feeling really overwhelmed right now.”

● Ask open-ended questions: This enables you to explore what’s going on rather than encouraging a simple “yes” or “no” answer. For example, you could ask, “What’s been on your mind lately?” instead of “Are you ok?”

3. Show Your Concern Without Adding Pressure

If your friend isn’t ready to talk, respect their pace and be mindful not to push for details — just knowing you’re there for them can be a huge comfort.

You can let them know they’re not alone by saying something like:

● “I care about you, and whenever you’re ready to talk, I am here.”

● “You don’t have to go through this by yourself. Remember, you are not alone.”

Practical Ways to Offer Support

Being a supportive friend doesn’t mean you need to have all the answers. Instead, you can show up in a variety of supportive ways.

1. Encourage Professional Help

Suggesting professional support can be a crucial step when your friend is struggling. Some people worry that counselling or therapy is only for extreme cases, or that it may be too expensive. In reality, professional support is valuable for anyone facing emotional distress and can be offered at subsidised and affordable rates.

You could approach the subject like this:

● Normalise it: “Many people talk to therapists. It’s the same as going to the doctor when you’re not feeling well.”

● Offer to help with research options: Ask permission and then look for mental health professionals, support lines or support groups that may be within your friend’s budget. There can even be free support group or counselling options depending on your location and healthcare providers.

● Support without forcing: You can’t make them attend a support group or seek therapy. However, your encouragement and presence can help them to feel more comfortable to take that step when they feel ready. In the meantime, the first step they have taken in speaking to you as a trusted friend can make all the difference to help them feel safe, heard and supported.

2. Engage in Supportive Activities Together

If your friend self-isolates, this can worsen their mental health struggles. Even small activities can help them to feel connected and supported, making tough days a little easier. Suggest they join you in:

● Going for a walk: Fresh air and movement can be uplifting for the mind, body and soul.

● Practising a hobby together: Painting, cooking or physical exercise for Mindfulness can provide them with a nurturing mental break and a reason to continue engaging in things that bring them joy.

● Having a movie or game night: Lighthearted activities and entertainment can offer a welcome distraction to what they are going through.

3. Recognise Signs of Crisis

It’s natural to worry about recognising the warning signs of a crisis. If your friend is struggling, taking their feelings seriously and offering support can make a difference.

Some signs that may indicate they need immediate help include:

● Talking about feeling helpless or like a burden.

● Withdrawing from family and friends.

● Increased substance use.

● Saying things like, “I can’t do this anymore.”

If your friend is in crisis, these steps may help:

● Stay with them.

● Encourage them to reach out to a crisis or support line service.

● Call emergency services if necessary.

Your support makes a difference

Supporting a friend through mental health challenges takes patience, compassion and understanding. Remember that you don’t need all the right words — just being there can make a huge difference. By offering a listening ear, encouraging professional help and regularly checking in, you can be a source of strength and comfort when they need it most. Your support to your friend matters more than you know.

Most importantly, take care of yourself, too. Supporting a companion can be emotionally challenging, so remember to set boundaries and seek support if you need it. A healthy, balanced friendship benefits you both.